I Hid in My Own House 38 Days and Became World Champion
I Hid in My Own House for 38 Days and Accidentally Became the World Hide and Seek Champion
Official record: 38 days, 9 hours, 47 minutes.
Place: My own 3-bedroom house in suburban Ohio.
Number of seekers: 12 professional players + 3 million live viewers.
Prize: Giant golden trophy + lifetime pizza from Domino’s.
My name is Greg. I am now the undefeated, undisputed, completely accidental World Hide and Seek Champion of 2025.
And I never left my property.
How It Started (A Drunk Bet)
October 2025. I’m at the pub. Some guy says: “No one can hide for more than 30 days in the new World Hide & Seek League.”
I was drunk. I said: “I’ll do 40 days in my own house. Easy.”
Everyone laughed.
I signed the contract the next morning.
Entry fee: $200 Prize: $50,000 trophy + lifetime pizza
Rules: You can hide anywhere in your own property. Seekers have 40 days to find you. Live 24/7 cameras.
The Strategy (There Was No Strategy)
Day 1: I went into the attic and fell asleep.
Day 4: I discovered the crawl space under the stairs has Wi-Fi.
Day 9: I built a nest from old Christmas decorations and bubble wrap.
Day 17: I started talking to a spider named Gerald.
Day 25: I forgot what sunlight feels like.
Day 38: The seekers gave up. I won by default.
The Best Moments (According to 3.2 Million Viewers)
- Day 11: I ate an entire birthday cake I found from 2019. Still good.
- Day 19: Did a 3-hour whisper ASMR about my feelings. Chat loved it.
- Day 27: Wore a ghost sheet and scared seeker #7. He screamed like a child.
- Day 34: Started a podcast from under the house called “Attic Thoughts with Greg”
The Final Day
Day 38, 9 hours, 47 minutes.
Official announcement: “Greg is the 2025 World Hide and Seek Champion!”
I crawled out covered in dust, holding Gerald the spider in a matchbox.
Crowd of 3,000 people outside my house chanting my name.
I hadn’t showered in 38 days.
I didn’t care.
I won.
My Life Now
Domino’s delivers free pizza every day at 3 p.m.
I have a blue checkmark on Twitter that just says “World Champion 🏆”
Gerald the spider has his own Instagram.
And I never have to work again.
Because apparently being really, really good at hiding in your own house is now a career.
2025 is wild.

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